Schizophrenia is mental illness where brain works faster but less precisely.
Electrical Impulses in brain flow to neurons via synapses and there are other mechanisms that also facilitate electric signals flow in one's body.
Mentally Ill people's impulses in brain are a mess.
... not sure about signals in spine and in the rest of human's nervous systems.
Anyway, since few days i have understood a lot about computer sciences / had voices in my head /, but neglected quality of life.
... could not focus on work, neglected basic needs, etc.
... it signals incoming mental crisis.
Yes, faster mind and enhanced thinking are nice, but who wants to be smelly mad scientist?
... one should care for basic needs first, then think about science i think.
... i want to be Scientist with the Great Style.
As for things i understood deeper than before, these are:
- State of Conversation between two objects:
- Useful mostly in applications where application parts communicate via network such as the internet;
- Turing Machine theory:
- What is the Turing Machine, how it works ... and what it can do,
- / it's an important part of 'Languages & Automatons' University lecture /;
- Differencies and similarities between Stack Machines and Register Machines:
- Register Machines are similar and equivalent to the Turing Machines,
- Perhaps more, but i forgot for now.
Saturday, 25 June 2022
Saturday, 24 August 2019
Is working Therapeutic? How about medicals, genes, meeting people?
Work can be therapeutic.
While working is challenge for ill people, far more than sane society thinks ... unemployment & money problems are also causes of great stress.
Too big or too small stress affects mental health negatively - is one of main three causes of mental illness symptoms returning & intensifying.
Genes also matter, statistically - but not always insanity is inherited directly, not every generation as well.
Group and/or personal therapy, psychotropic medicines, psychologists/psychiatrists, etc ... also help to avoid intensifying of symptoms - both in short and in long run.
Meeting with friendly people also helps ... but not always those who pretend to be friends are truly friends. Verbal and other abuses harm, lead to insanity & symptoms.
... i think its worthwhile to work, or at least prepare for work, then get employed, then to continue fighting to keep work, perhaps also try to advance to better jobs.
One should also consider not too challenging jobs, but what is too challenging? This is something everyone - either sane or mentally ill - should answer for himself or herself.
There are job offers for ill people, at least in European Union ... for example: POWER / pl: 'Program Obywatelski Wiedza Edukacja Rozwój / - thanks to it i still have my current employment - as a physical security specialist. They helped me to find this job, and they support me still, making it easier for me to not lose this job so easily ... i am grateful for all that EU's POWER gave me.
While working is challenge for ill people, far more than sane society thinks ... unemployment & money problems are also causes of great stress.
Too big or too small stress affects mental health negatively - is one of main three causes of mental illness symptoms returning & intensifying.
Genes also matter, statistically - but not always insanity is inherited directly, not every generation as well.
Group and/or personal therapy, psychotropic medicines, psychologists/psychiatrists, etc ... also help to avoid intensifying of symptoms - both in short and in long run.
Meeting with friendly people also helps ... but not always those who pretend to be friends are truly friends. Verbal and other abuses harm, lead to insanity & symptoms.
... i think its worthwhile to work, or at least prepare for work, then get employed, then to continue fighting to keep work, perhaps also try to advance to better jobs.
One should also consider not too challenging jobs, but what is too challenging? This is something everyone - either sane or mentally ill - should answer for himself or herself.
There are job offers for ill people, at least in European Union ... for example: POWER / pl: 'Program Obywatelski Wiedza Edukacja Rozwój / - thanks to it i still have my current employment - as a physical security specialist. They helped me to find this job, and they support me still, making it easier for me to not lose this job so easily ... i am grateful for all that EU's POWER gave me.
Wednesday, 21 August 2019
... insane thoughts, blogs deletion question/risk.
... have thoughts about deleting this blog as well, about wiping traces from the internet, about shutting my own mouth, disappearing from sight, getting closed in psychiatric/jail, about getting killed ... to cover/hide 'bad deeds', 'errors' of 'more important buddhists & others'.
> [ https://project-wraithstar.blogspot.com/2019/08/should-i-delete-this-blog.html ].
> [ https://project-wraithstar.blogspot.com/2019/08/should-i-delete-this-blog.html ].
Thursday, 15 August 2019
'Selective Memory' - is it a sin?
... some time ago - i understood Predicate Logic Basics, then quickly forgot ... perhaps in future it will be better.
... my memory is 'selective', i only remember what's important at given moment.
... it's psychological weakness ... some think that i abuse this argument, but it's medical issue.
... i was accused of 'selective memory' at youth as well - i think it was unfair.
... in psychiatric hospital i heard that 'schizophrenia is memory-related illness', more or less.
... not sure if it was psychiatrist, psychologist or other medical personnel who told me that.
... my memory is 'selective', i only remember what's important at given moment.
... it's psychological weakness ... some think that i abuse this argument, but it's medical issue.
... i was accused of 'selective memory' at youth as well - i think it was unfair.
... in psychiatric hospital i heard that 'schizophrenia is memory-related illness', more or less.
... not sure if it was psychiatrist, psychologist or other medical personnel who told me that.
Tuesday, 13 August 2019
... i feel raped by martial arts & others.
> EN:
... having insane mind states / i think mind states are: thoughts & feelings; i read that emotions are feelings with physiology - not only salivation, also nervomuscular reactions & behaviors, etc. /.
... i feel raped by martial arts & others - mostly because of 'Yoda', disgrace among buddhist martial arts teachers.
... then had some insane thoughts that some people want to 'fuck me out of benefits of blog's deletion'.
... not only 'Martial Arts, Tactics & Combat Psychology by neomahakala108' blog, also other blogs i think.
... i got beaten so strongly during one of 'lessons' - years ago, i feel effects on mind & body levels still ... feeling raped, does rape lead to suicide? ... is it a form of 'Dim Mak'? ... should 'Yoda' be put into jail?
... is 'Dim Mak' just a glorified name for murder & rape?
> PL:
... mam wariackie stany umysłu - myśli i uczucia / myślę że stany umysłu to: myśli i uczucia; przeczytałem że emocje to uczucia z fizjologią - nie tylko ślinienie się, ale też reakcje i zachowania nerwomięśniowe, etc. /.
... czuję się zgwałcony przez sztuki walki i innych(-e) - głownie z przyczyny 'Yody', zakały wśród buddyjskich nauczycieli sztuk walki.
... następnie miałem chore i zwariowane myśli że pewni ludzie chcą 'wydymać mnie z korzyści z usunięcia bloga'.
... nie tylko 'Martial Arts, Tactics & Combat Psychology by neomahakala108', także inne blogi.
... zostałem pobity tak mocno podczas jednej z 'lekcji' - lata temu, wciąż odczuwam skutki na poziomach umysłu i ciała ... czuję się zgwałcony, czy gwałt prowadzi do samobójstwa? ... czy to forma 'Dim Mak'? ... czy 'Yoda' powinien zostać wsadzony do więzienia?
... czy 'Dim Mak' to po prostu upiększona nazwa dla morderstwa i gwałtu?
--
... having insane mind states / i think mind states are: thoughts & feelings; i read that emotions are feelings with physiology - not only salivation, also nervomuscular reactions & behaviors, etc. /.
... i feel raped by martial arts & others - mostly because of 'Yoda', disgrace among buddhist martial arts teachers.
... then had some insane thoughts that some people want to 'fuck me out of benefits of blog's deletion'.
... not only 'Martial Arts, Tactics & Combat Psychology by neomahakala108' blog, also other blogs i think.
... i got beaten so strongly during one of 'lessons' - years ago, i feel effects on mind & body levels still ... feeling raped, does rape lead to suicide? ... is it a form of 'Dim Mak'? ... should 'Yoda' be put into jail?
... is 'Dim Mak' just a glorified name for murder & rape?
> PL:
... mam wariackie stany umysłu - myśli i uczucia / myślę że stany umysłu to: myśli i uczucia; przeczytałem że emocje to uczucia z fizjologią - nie tylko ślinienie się, ale też reakcje i zachowania nerwomięśniowe, etc. /.
... czuję się zgwałcony przez sztuki walki i innych(-e) - głownie z przyczyny 'Yody', zakały wśród buddyjskich nauczycieli sztuk walki.
... następnie miałem chore i zwariowane myśli że pewni ludzie chcą 'wydymać mnie z korzyści z usunięcia bloga'.
... nie tylko 'Martial Arts, Tactics & Combat Psychology by neomahakala108', także inne blogi.
... zostałem pobity tak mocno podczas jednej z 'lekcji' - lata temu, wciąż odczuwam skutki na poziomach umysłu i ciała ... czuję się zgwałcony, czy gwałt prowadzi do samobójstwa? ... czy to forma 'Dim Mak'? ... czy 'Yoda' powinien zostać wsadzony do więzienia?
... czy 'Dim Mak' to po prostu upiększona nazwa dla morderstwa i gwałtu?
--
Wednesday, 24 July 2019
Freedom, Inequality-Equality & One's Worth.
... i have heard from one of my psychologists a phrase, more or less exactly:
> en: 'every human is equally worthy, no matter healthy or ill'.
> pl: 'każdy człowiek jest równie wartościowy, nie ważne czy chory, czy zdrowy'.
... is it true?
... i think all human beings have full rights - we have only what we fight for, we have only what we win.
... no need to fight alone, i think still, as well.
... we have human rights, democracies, ..., freedom of speech - but so what?
... i think communism is too much of equality - everyone has money - but no one works - scarce products on shelves, product reglamentation,
... i think capitalism is too much of unequality, not only money-wise.
... what's beyond capitalism? ... there's book called 'netocracy'.
...
... there are those who fight for tibet's freedom ... but well - what is tibet's freedom?
... is it right of tibetan people to have love, kids, fair living, respect, ... ?
... i think one can have freedom even under occupation.
... i think it's still wise to fight for language, for manners, for culture, for art, for education, for ideas, for spirituality - how important are tibetan prayer flags, vajra symbols, mantra wheels - in tibetan buddhist temples? why chinese rulers try to 'reduce' temples in tibet? are tibetans 'second class citizens' in tibet after china's invasion?
... i've offered publicly in the internet to serve china against terrorism - i do not want money for that, price is tibet's freedom.
... but i also fight for tibet's freedom other ways - including criticizing 'spirituality reduction' and providing other arguments to those who fight for tibet more seriously, who are more involved.
... i admire 'chinese manners', i read that china is the most overpopulated nation in the world, but territory is so smaller than U.S. and Russia. How easy is to earn 'permission to have kids'? is it true meaning of 'difficult childhood' in china?
... i think china controls anger well, so it's easy to talk and let chinese migrate to other parts of the world ... instead of starting wars.
... is overpopulation considered only in china's territory?
... even if not, or even if yes - what follows, where this leads?
Sen Zu - 'What we have'.
... what ideas we have 'only' in Mind, what we have in physical reality?
What is meaning of the buddhist lesson/experience - not only on theory level:
'We are Mind(-s), we have body(-ies)'
'Illusory nature of Reality' is something related, but not so similar still,
... i feel,
... i think,
... i remember.
> en: 'every human is equally worthy, no matter healthy or ill'.
> pl: 'każdy człowiek jest równie wartościowy, nie ważne czy chory, czy zdrowy'.
... is it true?
... i think all human beings have full rights - we have only what we fight for, we have only what we win.
... no need to fight alone, i think still, as well.
... we have human rights, democracies, ..., freedom of speech - but so what?
... i think communism is too much of equality - everyone has money - but no one works - scarce products on shelves, product reglamentation,
... i think capitalism is too much of unequality, not only money-wise.
... what's beyond capitalism? ... there's book called 'netocracy'.
...
... there are those who fight for tibet's freedom ... but well - what is tibet's freedom?
... is it right of tibetan people to have love, kids, fair living, respect, ... ?
... i think one can have freedom even under occupation.
... i think it's still wise to fight for language, for manners, for culture, for art, for education, for ideas, for spirituality - how important are tibetan prayer flags, vajra symbols, mantra wheels - in tibetan buddhist temples? why chinese rulers try to 'reduce' temples in tibet? are tibetans 'second class citizens' in tibet after china's invasion?
... i've offered publicly in the internet to serve china against terrorism - i do not want money for that, price is tibet's freedom.
... but i also fight for tibet's freedom other ways - including criticizing 'spirituality reduction' and providing other arguments to those who fight for tibet more seriously, who are more involved.
... i admire 'chinese manners', i read that china is the most overpopulated nation in the world, but territory is so smaller than U.S. and Russia. How easy is to earn 'permission to have kids'? is it true meaning of 'difficult childhood' in china?
... i think china controls anger well, so it's easy to talk and let chinese migrate to other parts of the world ... instead of starting wars.
... is overpopulation considered only in china's territory?
... even if not, or even if yes - what follows, where this leads?
Sen Zu - 'What we have'.
... what ideas we have 'only' in Mind, what we have in physical reality?
What is meaning of the buddhist lesson/experience - not only on theory level:
'We are Mind(-s), we have body(-ies)'
'Illusory nature of Reality' is something related, but not so similar still,
... i feel,
... i think,
... i remember.
Thursday, 18 July 2019
Without insanity World would be Better, What it means?
... is it wise and compassionate to shoot ill, crippled, disabled people ?
... is 'bad karma' excuse to hate, to 'rape' people ?
... is psychiatric hospital a punishment for being 'raped by society' ?
... is it therapeutic to turn psychotherapy into jail ?
Psychologists i've met are different than most of ignorant jerks.
... i need to visit psychologists & other medical/support personnel still - neglecting therapy & medicines too much leads to more serious symptoms later and many months in psychiatric hospital, probably lost job, and other threats.
... is 'bad karma' excuse to hate, to 'rape' people ?
... is psychiatric hospital a punishment for being 'raped by society' ?
... is it therapeutic to turn psychotherapy into jail ?
Psychologists i've met are different than most of ignorant jerks.
... i need to visit psychologists & other medical/support personnel still - neglecting therapy & medicines too much leads to more serious symptoms later and many months in psychiatric hospital, probably lost job, and other threats.
Saturday, 30 March 2019
Ignorance.
... i think ... please try to understand.
insanity is sick, madness is holy & healthy (still insane). worst form of insanity is egoism, to me, at least. ego still has uses, can be sane.
too much sanity at cost of others leads to insanity. even if they reverse meaning and call insanity madness and madness insanity. eventually karma returns.
too much of holiness is unhealthy - too egoistic, it separates.
Monday, 21 January 2019
Insanity & Violence.
With the recent murder of polish politician, Paweł Adamowicz - who was killed by insane murderer with knife, i think i should speak my opinion - even if this will bring unwanted attention to me.
Uninformed voices in tv, internet & in other media blame mentally-ill people too much, i think.
... i am a mad person as well, i trained martial arts - including knife combat, as well.
In Poland it's not against the law for mad people to have knife or a nonlethal gas gun, but owning a firearm requires permit which isn't given to mentally ill, as far as i know. My father was animal hunter, owned some rifles in a gun-safe - and when he ended in psychiatric hospital, these were confiscated from him.
Judging from my experience and contact with other mad or insane people, i think that a small percentage of us are dangerous, others are mostly victims of uninformed & prejudiced parts of our society. Thankfully most of people who know that i am mad, treat me kindly.
Most of people do not know what insanity is, what are symptoms of mental illness.
Aggression & violence are not associated with mental ilness, most of mad people are shy and introverted - but not everyone.
When someone has violent/aggressive personality, however, these - when combined with insanity-induced delusions & detachment from reality - can result in dangerous behaviour.
Martial Arts are also misunderstood by the most. Goal of Martial Arts isn't violence, it's about defeating one's own weaknesses, it's about being a better person than day earlier. A well-trained person does not have any need to prove his or her strength, he or she knows his or her value, is not afraid of avoiding combat, is not afraid of being called 'coward'. Better combat training allows one to win combats without excessive use of force, to subdue enemies without harming them too much.
Uninformed voices in tv, internet & in other media blame mentally-ill people too much, i think.
... i am a mad person as well, i trained martial arts - including knife combat, as well.
In Poland it's not against the law for mad people to have knife or a nonlethal gas gun, but owning a firearm requires permit which isn't given to mentally ill, as far as i know. My father was animal hunter, owned some rifles in a gun-safe - and when he ended in psychiatric hospital, these were confiscated from him.
Judging from my experience and contact with other mad or insane people, i think that a small percentage of us are dangerous, others are mostly victims of uninformed & prejudiced parts of our society. Thankfully most of people who know that i am mad, treat me kindly.
Most of people do not know what insanity is, what are symptoms of mental illness.
Aggression & violence are not associated with mental ilness, most of mad people are shy and introverted - but not everyone.
When someone has violent/aggressive personality, however, these - when combined with insanity-induced delusions & detachment from reality - can result in dangerous behaviour.
Martial Arts are also misunderstood by the most. Goal of Martial Arts isn't violence, it's about defeating one's own weaknesses, it's about being a better person than day earlier. A well-trained person does not have any need to prove his or her strength, he or she knows his or her value, is not afraid of avoiding combat, is not afraid of being called 'coward'. Better combat training allows one to win combats without excessive use of force, to subdue enemies without harming them too much.
Saturday, 14 July 2018
Quality of Life.
... in the materialistic society, people are entangled in a rat-race for wealth, forgetting about quality of life.
Recently i've got support of a very good psychotherapist, from Beata Januszewska.
She prepares me for work, not only by contacting with a job advisor - but also - for better life.
She helps me to renovate my apartment, which was uncared for years, is in bad shape and has smells.
Smells of my apartment sticks to me and my clothing, making me smelly as well.
... in that state, i have troubles of finding Love and Employment.
... i need a strong female hand to recover from crisis, and she's that beneficial person who strongly supports me and helps.
She's quite efficient and merciless in abolishing my faults, she arranges for paint for my walls, for my new furniture - all without my financial involvement, for free.
This is not a small task at all, it's great support and help.
She also motivates me to clean apartment, to get rid of unneccessary things from my apartment, get dressed nicely, to be well shaved, with a nice haircut, to look and smell nice.
She's part of european union's empowerment program, that i can benefit from again.
With work alone i won't survive, i need far more to succeed in Love.
Thankfully, there are efforts for that as well.
My thanks for everyone involved, i think this program is needed to reactivate people and turn hopelessness into meaningful life.
i hope others will benefit as well - if you are deep in crisis, contact nearby psychologist and ask for POWER European Union's program - or other equvialents in Your nation or country. In nations other than Poland, this program is probably named differently.
... it's worth to try, i think.
See also if You wish: a Prayer for a Nice Look & Fragrance.
Recently i've got support of a very good psychotherapist, from Beata Januszewska.
She prepares me for work, not only by contacting with a job advisor - but also - for better life.
She helps me to renovate my apartment, which was uncared for years, is in bad shape and has smells.
Smells of my apartment sticks to me and my clothing, making me smelly as well.
... in that state, i have troubles of finding Love and Employment.
... i need a strong female hand to recover from crisis, and she's that beneficial person who strongly supports me and helps.
She's quite efficient and merciless in abolishing my faults, she arranges for paint for my walls, for my new furniture - all without my financial involvement, for free.
This is not a small task at all, it's great support and help.
She also motivates me to clean apartment, to get rid of unneccessary things from my apartment, get dressed nicely, to be well shaved, with a nice haircut, to look and smell nice.
She's part of european union's empowerment program, that i can benefit from again.
With work alone i won't survive, i need far more to succeed in Love.
Thankfully, there are efforts for that as well.
My thanks for everyone involved, i think this program is needed to reactivate people and turn hopelessness into meaningful life.
i hope others will benefit as well - if you are deep in crisis, contact nearby psychologist and ask for POWER European Union's program - or other equvialents in Your nation or country. In nations other than Poland, this program is probably named differently.
... it's worth to try, i think.
See also if You wish: a Prayer for a Nice Look & Fragrance.
Friday, 25 May 2018
Insomnia.
i am unable to sleep again.
i think it's result of improper meditation, of our fellow buddhist 'friends'.
had insight that they wished to sleep earlier, and to have someone finish their chores during nights.
during night, i do not want to wake up a buddhist woman i love, even in mind.
i have almost no support during nights, i am weaker, hence it's time when i am vulnerable to be attacked, to be woken up and forced to work.
i think certain jerks take advantage of that.
i am unemployed, but this is not excuse for having to sleep irregularly - it destroys my sleep health habits, it makes me unable to function during days.
when i sleep irregularly i am unable to find and keep my work, it's feels as endless cycle of being unable to work, because i do not work already.
it's not fair to not let others sleep, prepare, find and keep paid work.
... dear fellow buddhist friends, please meditate better, and do your own chores by yourself.
if i keep waking up, i'll hate parts of my mind as well, and eventually people associated with these parts.
what occurs on mind level, awakens in speech and body later, afterall.
i think it's result of improper meditation, of our fellow buddhist 'friends'.
had insight that they wished to sleep earlier, and to have someone finish their chores during nights.
during night, i do not want to wake up a buddhist woman i love, even in mind.
i have almost no support during nights, i am weaker, hence it's time when i am vulnerable to be attacked, to be woken up and forced to work.
i think certain jerks take advantage of that.
i am unemployed, but this is not excuse for having to sleep irregularly - it destroys my sleep health habits, it makes me unable to function during days.
when i sleep irregularly i am unable to find and keep my work, it's feels as endless cycle of being unable to work, because i do not work already.
it's not fair to not let others sleep, prepare, find and keep paid work.
... dear fellow buddhist friends, please meditate better, and do your own chores by yourself.
if i keep waking up, i'll hate parts of my mind as well, and eventually people associated with these parts.
what occurs on mind level, awakens in speech and body later, afterall.
Tuesday, 13 March 2018
Within Walls.
Introduction.
Recent years i made many aspirations, wishes to improve, to be a better person.
Usually at first i had good results, then i hit obstacles - while my ego consciously wished for better, my unconscious self-complexes / complex is structure in psyche / opposed.
My bad karma surfaced, i was struggling between opposites - of high aspirations, and of these parts of my self that i prefer to reeject.
Ego has to die.
Like Ouroboros, Snake-Dragon eating it's tail to breed, ego has to die to make room for one's improvement.
Why is it so, if one's ego is striving for perfection?
Problem is that this perfection is imperfect still.
One is held between walls of one's own ego & one's self-complexes.
This is a crushing prison that blinds and hinders one's freedom.
'If you remain within arbitrary and artificially created boundaries, you will walk as between two high walls: you do not see the immensity of the world. But if you break down the walls that confine your view, and if the immensity and its endless uncertainty inspire you with fear, then the ancient sleeper awakens in you, whose messenger is the white bird. Then you need the message of the old tamer of chaos. There in the whirl of chaos dwells eternal wonder. Your world begins to become wonderful. Man belongs not only to an ordered world, he also belongs in the wonder-world of his soul. Consequently you must make your ordered world horrible, so that you are put off by being too much outside yourself.'
-- Quoted from 'The Red Book' by C.G. Jung.
See also, if You wish: Self and Ego.
Recent years i made many aspirations, wishes to improve, to be a better person.
Usually at first i had good results, then i hit obstacles - while my ego consciously wished for better, my unconscious self-complexes / complex is structure in psyche / opposed.
My bad karma surfaced, i was struggling between opposites - of high aspirations, and of these parts of my self that i prefer to reeject.
Ego has to die.
Like Ouroboros, Snake-Dragon eating it's tail to breed, ego has to die to make room for one's improvement.
Why is it so, if one's ego is striving for perfection?
Problem is that this perfection is imperfect still.
One is held between walls of one's own ego & one's self-complexes.
This is a crushing prison that blinds and hinders one's freedom.
'If you remain within arbitrary and artificially created boundaries, you will walk as between two high walls: you do not see the immensity of the world. But if you break down the walls that confine your view, and if the immensity and its endless uncertainty inspire you with fear, then the ancient sleeper awakens in you, whose messenger is the white bird. Then you need the message of the old tamer of chaos. There in the whirl of chaos dwells eternal wonder. Your world begins to become wonderful. Man belongs not only to an ordered world, he also belongs in the wonder-world of his soul. Consequently you must make your ordered world horrible, so that you are put off by being too much outside yourself.'
-- Quoted from 'The Red Book' by C.G. Jung.
See also, if You wish: Self and Ego.
Friday, 2 February 2018
Power of the Teams in a Mental Support.
Every person is different, we have brighter & darker parts of our personality.
Every person should be treated differently, uniquely.
Not every therapist can address every of a person's ill parts.
... it's like a candle that when set-up by a person, it will cast light, but also create a shadow.
... a light from one source won't reach all of dark corners of one's Mind.
But multiple lights from all directions can eliminate shadow much more completely.
... it's best to work in teams, therefore.
i think this thought is related with the Buddhist Vipassana Mind-Calming Meditation.
Every person should be treated differently, uniquely.
Not every therapist can address every of a person's ill parts.
... it's like a candle that when set-up by a person, it will cast light, but also create a shadow.
... a light from one source won't reach all of dark corners of one's Mind.
But multiple lights from all directions can eliminate shadow much more completely.
... it's best to work in teams, therefore.
i think this thought is related with the Buddhist Vipassana Mind-Calming Meditation.
Friday, 27 October 2017
Teaching Meditation on Breath & Mental Ilness.
On today's 'Ex-In' (experience involved, psychotherapy more or less) course i took responsibility of introducing rest of group into simple meditation on breath, that i composed myself, using my own knowledge & experience.
Most of us are mentally ill, we know a lot about our mental ills, this course prepares us to support / help other mentally ill people professionally, in teams with psychiatrists, psychologists & psychotherapist.
Goal of this meditation is developing mind calmness & enhancing self discovery, mostly.
Meditation is dangerous for mentally ill people, but our group needs it - they requested me to teach them this.
i need support, calm mind, wisdom, compassion, protection & beneficial speech to succeed.
This will occur in 2 weeks (10 November 2017 11:00 AM Warsaw Time), not earlier - but perhaps later, if at all.
Thanks in advance to those who will support or help, if anyone.
Most of us are mentally ill, we know a lot about our mental ills, this course prepares us to support / help other mentally ill people professionally, in teams with psychiatrists, psychologists & psychotherapist.
Goal of this meditation is developing mind calmness & enhancing self discovery, mostly.
Meditation is dangerous for mentally ill people, but our group needs it - they requested me to teach them this.
i need support, calm mind, wisdom, compassion, protection & beneficial speech to succeed.
This will occur in 2 weeks (10 November 2017 11:00 AM Warsaw Time), not earlier - but perhaps later, if at all.
Thanks in advance to those who will support or help, if anyone.
Tuesday, 15 August 2017
Shared Psychotic Disorder, what can help?
Is Psychosis contagious?
Unfortunately it can be - for details: click a link.
What is Psychosis?
Psychosis is a mental disorder, often occuring before schizophrenia. It's symptoms are delusions, sensory hallucinations, sleeping disorders, mood swings & extremes, possibly paranoic fear.
While psychotic episode can be permanently cured, schizophrenia rarely can be. There are of course states of remission, patient can behave sanely for long periods of time - and need for hospitalization might be reduced to minimum.
What can help?
Calmness, relaxation, distance, criticism & delaying rash decision until one has calm moment to think over these.
i also think that one should speak (or write) - especially in media, including in the internet social media - as little as possible, when suffering from illness symptoms.
Speaking should occur in a contained therapic environment, however - as neglecting it might cause stress & problems to accumulate in subconsciousness over time, worsening one's state in the result.
'i have some symptoms, should i visit a doctor?'
Many of healthy people occassionally have symptoms as delusions or sensory hallucinations, or other.
What makes visiting doctor needed is failing at handling real-life's situations because of these.
Even when this occurs, one should not go to psychiatrist at first, one should consult psychologist instead. When neccessary, psychologist will send one to a psychiatrist or administer proper therapy.
What is the difference between psychology & psychiatry?
Psychology is talking, counselling, advice & psychotherapy - using words & exercises. It's finer method, gentler than psychiatry. No medicines are administered.
Psychiatry is administering medicines, often in a mental hospital - so doctors can observe how patients reacts to a certain medicines. Being at a hospital also ensures that risk of harming oneself or others is reduced to a minimum. If medicines are working inefficiently, visit in the hospital is longer, as different ones are tried. Whole process takes time, one cannot just take away pills and next day administer full dose of another pills. Effects of therapy also take time, as does observing these over a certain period.
Psychology can occur without psychotherapy, psychotherapy is best combined with psychology.
Psychiatric medicines are powerful, and often have side-effects on a patient - but well-selected medicines have neglible effects.
i think it's worth to wait until proper medicines are administered, but often it takes too long - as patient's body must get used to these. Usually after a few visits to hospital, best medicines are chosen at last.
Unfortunately it can be - for details: click a link.
What is Psychosis?
Psychosis is a mental disorder, often occuring before schizophrenia. It's symptoms are delusions, sensory hallucinations, sleeping disorders, mood swings & extremes, possibly paranoic fear.
While psychotic episode can be permanently cured, schizophrenia rarely can be. There are of course states of remission, patient can behave sanely for long periods of time - and need for hospitalization might be reduced to minimum.
What can help?
Calmness, relaxation, distance, criticism & delaying rash decision until one has calm moment to think over these.
i also think that one should speak (or write) - especially in media, including in the internet social media - as little as possible, when suffering from illness symptoms.
Speaking should occur in a contained therapic environment, however - as neglecting it might cause stress & problems to accumulate in subconsciousness over time, worsening one's state in the result.
'i have some symptoms, should i visit a doctor?'
Many of healthy people occassionally have symptoms as delusions or sensory hallucinations, or other.
What makes visiting doctor needed is failing at handling real-life's situations because of these.
Even when this occurs, one should not go to psychiatrist at first, one should consult psychologist instead. When neccessary, psychologist will send one to a psychiatrist or administer proper therapy.
What is the difference between psychology & psychiatry?
Psychology is talking, counselling, advice & psychotherapy - using words & exercises. It's finer method, gentler than psychiatry. No medicines are administered.
Psychiatry is administering medicines, often in a mental hospital - so doctors can observe how patients reacts to a certain medicines. Being at a hospital also ensures that risk of harming oneself or others is reduced to a minimum. If medicines are working inefficiently, visit in the hospital is longer, as different ones are tried. Whole process takes time, one cannot just take away pills and next day administer full dose of another pills. Effects of therapy also take time, as does observing these over a certain period.
Psychology can occur without psychotherapy, psychotherapy is best combined with psychology.
Psychiatric medicines are powerful, and often have side-effects on a patient - but well-selected medicines have neglible effects.
i think it's worth to wait until proper medicines are administered, but often it takes too long - as patient's body must get used to these. Usually after a few visits to hospital, best medicines are chosen at last.
Saturday, 29 July 2017
'Ex-In' Module 02/10 - 'Empowerment'.
Module 2 - 'Empowerment'.
This module also was about exercises over theory.
How to empower ourselves or someone depends on people involved, we have to develop our own methods for each case. There are plenty of these.
Proper communication is important in that, words have power to heal or destroy.
Understanding oneself is a strength, understanding others as well.
Protecting our secrets & weaknessess, as well as releasing difficult emotions in a safe situations can be empowering as well.
In our lives & therapisits employment we'll face different people - some nice, some rude, some aggressive. Wisely choosing our roles (when possible) & masks might prove protection & an invaluable tools, teaching others to choose these can help them as well.
1. Favourite Role.
In life we are put in different roles.
During exercise everyone chose a group in which he or she finds himself or herself most comfortable - among 'leaders', 'supporters' & 'outsiders'.
We talked within our groups about strong & weak points of our roles.
Then we acted out, theatrically expressing these strong & weak points.
Then we talked about these strong/weak points, scenes, roles & common points.
2. Empowerment by Expression.
We sang uplifting texts, combined with proper gestures that added power to this expression.
Texts included:
- 'With open helmet visor, i go to the battle!',
- 'i know my value, and i am proud of it!'.
We learned that sounds of songs are liberating spirit, gestures strenghten, words we speak create us.
Then we talked about feelings & thoughts about this exercise.
We learned that shouting out feelings allows to get rid of emotional garbage, and during psychotherapy there are other methods for that as well - for example by asking someone to throw a pillow or to kick a chair.
We learned that we have blockades that make these exercises difficult, but there are methods to overcome these.
3. Masks.
In a center of room there were various face masks.
Each of us chose two of the masks, one representing mask we wear everyday, and one representing mask we wear in difficult situations.
Then we explained our choices between whole group.
We learned that talking about masks is emotionally difficult, it's in a way 'demasking ourselves' - revealing our secrets & weaknessess.
We learned that mask can be fitting well or cumbersome, there might be need to replace one's mask with other type of a mask.
We learned that masks obscure what's inside, can make feelings accumulate in psyche. Succesfully removing a mask can be liberating, but difficult endeavour.
We learned that masks can be worn subconsciously or with deliberation. Well fitting mask might protect us, might be a 'dynamic truth' that transforms us - mask becomes part of personality.
In our lives masks might be very useful tool for fitting in our social roles (work, parenthood, ...).
4. Emotions of discovery & revealing.
'Leaders' from exercise 1st were randomly assigned groups in which we talked about feelings & thoughts associated with exercise 3rd.
Group leaders related our written reports to everyone, we had opportunity to talk about our findings as well.
5. Orchestra.
Shy volunteers assumed roles of orchestra's leaders, conductors.
Each of conductors in turns gave tasks to each of course's participants (making sounds as howls, talking, hand clapping, stomping, etc ...), then directed 'concerto' by properly gesturing to make chosen people or groups to increase or decrease volume, change tempo, or to silence everyone.
Then we split into groups randomly, each participant was assigned to a conductor. We talked in groups about this exercise, then conductors related group's opinions in one phrase before whole of course's participants.
6. Drawing by Descriptions.
We were paired randomly with other course's participants, each of us randomly chose one of beautiful images provided by course's staff.
In pairs, one of participants described, spoke about image without showing it to other. The other painted or drew it on a piece of paper - asking questions, getting answers as needed. Then we changed roles.
Then we talked about exercise.
We learned that communication has this property, that we skip 'obvious elements' from our descriptions - but what is obvious to one, doesn't have to be obvious to other.
We learned that during communication it's important to name ideas, to listen, to ask questions.
7. Getting into someone's shoes.
We were paired randomly with other course's participants, then one of us followed other for 10 minutes, mimicking every move. After 10 minutes, roles changed - other followed one who led before.
Then we talked about exercise before whole group.
We learned that when we get in someone's shoes, distance is very useful.
We learned that leading partner should be responsible & take into account follower's limitations & needs - but not everyone does that.
We learned that there's difference between empathy & identification.
We learned that kids learn by mimicking parents; we learned that one who is authority, a model - should be responsible, be careful of what he or she is doing.
We understood that distance is useful for getting whole picture - as in Impressionist Art, where from close distance one can see only colorful dots, but at distance whole image can be seen.
8. Deaf Phone.
Randomly selected course's participant (student) got quietly instructions from course's staff, about message to convey. He whispered to his neighbour (we sat in a circle in our room, chairs were placed that way). Message was passed by whispering into neighbours' ear, from a person to person - until whole circle was completed. Then last person spoke message aloud.
Final message was very different from original, yet it contained one word from original message.
We learned that the shorter message, the easier it is to remember.
We learned that longer messages are easily malformed.
We learned that we perceive, hear and understand through 'prism of ourselves'; when we have something we don't understand, or fail to hear, when there's something missing - we add our own personal content.
9. Empowering Letter.
We were paired randomly with other course's participants, then wrote a letter to our partner - something empowering, something that could let someone be stronger, feel nice, feel reassured.
Then we gave letters to whom they were wrote, and read these before whole group.
This module also was about exercises over theory.
How to empower ourselves or someone depends on people involved, we have to develop our own methods for each case. There are plenty of these.
Proper communication is important in that, words have power to heal or destroy.
Understanding oneself is a strength, understanding others as well.
Protecting our secrets & weaknessess, as well as releasing difficult emotions in a safe situations can be empowering as well.
In our lives & therapisits employment we'll face different people - some nice, some rude, some aggressive. Wisely choosing our roles (when possible) & masks might prove protection & an invaluable tools, teaching others to choose these can help them as well.
1. Favourite Role.
In life we are put in different roles.
During exercise everyone chose a group in which he or she finds himself or herself most comfortable - among 'leaders', 'supporters' & 'outsiders'.
We talked within our groups about strong & weak points of our roles.
Then we acted out, theatrically expressing these strong & weak points.
Then we talked about these strong/weak points, scenes, roles & common points.
2. Empowerment by Expression.
We sang uplifting texts, combined with proper gestures that added power to this expression.
Texts included:
- 'With open helmet visor, i go to the battle!',
- 'i know my value, and i am proud of it!'.
We learned that sounds of songs are liberating spirit, gestures strenghten, words we speak create us.
Then we talked about feelings & thoughts about this exercise.
We learned that shouting out feelings allows to get rid of emotional garbage, and during psychotherapy there are other methods for that as well - for example by asking someone to throw a pillow or to kick a chair.
We learned that we have blockades that make these exercises difficult, but there are methods to overcome these.
3. Masks.
In a center of room there were various face masks.
Each of us chose two of the masks, one representing mask we wear everyday, and one representing mask we wear in difficult situations.
Then we explained our choices between whole group.
We learned that talking about masks is emotionally difficult, it's in a way 'demasking ourselves' - revealing our secrets & weaknessess.
We learned that mask can be fitting well or cumbersome, there might be need to replace one's mask with other type of a mask.
We learned that masks obscure what's inside, can make feelings accumulate in psyche. Succesfully removing a mask can be liberating, but difficult endeavour.
We learned that masks can be worn subconsciously or with deliberation. Well fitting mask might protect us, might be a 'dynamic truth' that transforms us - mask becomes part of personality.
In our lives masks might be very useful tool for fitting in our social roles (work, parenthood, ...).
4. Emotions of discovery & revealing.
'Leaders' from exercise 1st were randomly assigned groups in which we talked about feelings & thoughts associated with exercise 3rd.
Group leaders related our written reports to everyone, we had opportunity to talk about our findings as well.
5. Orchestra.
Shy volunteers assumed roles of orchestra's leaders, conductors.
Each of conductors in turns gave tasks to each of course's participants (making sounds as howls, talking, hand clapping, stomping, etc ...), then directed 'concerto' by properly gesturing to make chosen people or groups to increase or decrease volume, change tempo, or to silence everyone.
Then we split into groups randomly, each participant was assigned to a conductor. We talked in groups about this exercise, then conductors related group's opinions in one phrase before whole of course's participants.
6. Drawing by Descriptions.
We were paired randomly with other course's participants, each of us randomly chose one of beautiful images provided by course's staff.
In pairs, one of participants described, spoke about image without showing it to other. The other painted or drew it on a piece of paper - asking questions, getting answers as needed. Then we changed roles.
Then we talked about exercise.
We learned that communication has this property, that we skip 'obvious elements' from our descriptions - but what is obvious to one, doesn't have to be obvious to other.
We learned that during communication it's important to name ideas, to listen, to ask questions.
7. Getting into someone's shoes.
We were paired randomly with other course's participants, then one of us followed other for 10 minutes, mimicking every move. After 10 minutes, roles changed - other followed one who led before.
Then we talked about exercise before whole group.
We learned that when we get in someone's shoes, distance is very useful.
We learned that leading partner should be responsible & take into account follower's limitations & needs - but not everyone does that.
We learned that there's difference between empathy & identification.
We learned that kids learn by mimicking parents; we learned that one who is authority, a model - should be responsible, be careful of what he or she is doing.
We understood that distance is useful for getting whole picture - as in Impressionist Art, where from close distance one can see only colorful dots, but at distance whole image can be seen.
8. Deaf Phone.
Randomly selected course's participant (student) got quietly instructions from course's staff, about message to convey. He whispered to his neighbour (we sat in a circle in our room, chairs were placed that way). Message was passed by whispering into neighbours' ear, from a person to person - until whole circle was completed. Then last person spoke message aloud.
Final message was very different from original, yet it contained one word from original message.
We learned that the shorter message, the easier it is to remember.
We learned that longer messages are easily malformed.
We learned that we perceive, hear and understand through 'prism of ourselves'; when we have something we don't understand, or fail to hear, when there's something missing - we add our own personal content.
9. Empowering Letter.
We were paired randomly with other course's participants, then wrote a letter to our partner - something empowering, something that could let someone be stronger, feel nice, feel reassured.
Then we gave letters to whom they were wrote, and read these before whole group.
Friday, 28 July 2017
'Ex-In' Module 01b/10 - 'Health & Good Mood'.
Module 01b - 'Health & Good Mood'.
This module also consisted mostly of group exercises.
We understood that this is a training group, with a 'pre-given formula'.
It wasn't a therapeutic group.
In a therapeutic group, staff follows patients without enforcing too strict form or too many of rules.
i've skipped one exercise in this article, because it's very difficult to convery with words alone. It taught us that there are often solutions to seemingly impossible problems. i still don't understand how we got it right. Part of group led, part followed, others reassured others to keep going. As a group we did succeed.
1. Sharing Experiences.
We were speaking about feeling we experienced during previous 3-day session.
2. Drawing Difficulties.
We split into groups, and drew or painted what's difficult in a previous 3-day session - from a group's point of view.
Then two representants of each group related plastic artwork's meanings & related comments to everyone.
After relation, anyone could add their own words.
This experience had a goal of expressing feelings, of naming feelings, worked with trust & cooperation in a group.
We understood that when we talk of something, this might touch a 'closed subject' of a person, make old thoughts & feelings alive again. This is good thing - it shows that there's personal emotional & thinking work to do still, at a convenient time & situation for that person.
We understood that exercises that touch feelings of a patient are beneficial, as these start a process of 'working with feelings', and allow everyone to handle accumulated feelings & stress, to get healthier.
We understood something about 'masks we wear' when we fulfill various life's roles - that these not only protect, but also can be cumbersome, can block.
We understood that during a therapist's work one has to bear 'weight of others', we were hinted that we'll learn methods of bearing other people's problems without getting overwhelmed by these, without burning out professionally.
We understood that to endure emotions of other people is similar to enduring one's own emotions. Methods for that are individual, vary per each person.
We understood that in a therapist's work we'll have to find a way to open a person, to help him or her express oneself, that there are 'keys to people', everyone has these.
3. Feelings Cards.
In a corridor there were put large placards with feeling names, with feeling pictures drawn symbolically & simply as well.
We walked around a corridor, we heard music song parts and stood by a proper placard that represented feelings we experienced during that song.
There were 10 songs in total.
We could see & understand how differently different people can react to the same stimuli that way.
4. Circle of Emotions.
We stood in a circle, each of participants spoke one feeling's name & expressed it with a gesture. Everyone repeated that gesture.
We understood that ways to express vary from a person to a person, that 'symbol is never explained forever'.
5. Emotions - Allies or Enemies.
We worked in groups, each group thought, talked and wrote about emotions, whether these are allies or enemies.
Then two representatives of each of our groups shared explainations to everyone.
We understood that during mental ilness emotions are sometimes inadequately shown. Certain people have difficulties of expressing feelings, this results in hindared reactions & social problems.
6. Gifts.
We randomly chose another person in a group, then gave him or her a small gift & commented that in a positive way, before whole group.
Something material or nonmaterial: a postacrd, a mascot, a good word/advice/wish, a banana, a cigarette, etc.
Everyone got a gift.
This module also consisted mostly of group exercises.
We understood that this is a training group, with a 'pre-given formula'.
It wasn't a therapeutic group.
In a therapeutic group, staff follows patients without enforcing too strict form or too many of rules.
i've skipped one exercise in this article, because it's very difficult to convery with words alone. It taught us that there are often solutions to seemingly impossible problems. i still don't understand how we got it right. Part of group led, part followed, others reassured others to keep going. As a group we did succeed.
1. Sharing Experiences.
We were speaking about feeling we experienced during previous 3-day session.
2. Drawing Difficulties.
We split into groups, and drew or painted what's difficult in a previous 3-day session - from a group's point of view.
Then two representants of each group related plastic artwork's meanings & related comments to everyone.
After relation, anyone could add their own words.
This experience had a goal of expressing feelings, of naming feelings, worked with trust & cooperation in a group.
We understood that when we talk of something, this might touch a 'closed subject' of a person, make old thoughts & feelings alive again. This is good thing - it shows that there's personal emotional & thinking work to do still, at a convenient time & situation for that person.
We understood that exercises that touch feelings of a patient are beneficial, as these start a process of 'working with feelings', and allow everyone to handle accumulated feelings & stress, to get healthier.
We understood something about 'masks we wear' when we fulfill various life's roles - that these not only protect, but also can be cumbersome, can block.
We understood that during a therapist's work one has to bear 'weight of others', we were hinted that we'll learn methods of bearing other people's problems without getting overwhelmed by these, without burning out professionally.
We understood that to endure emotions of other people is similar to enduring one's own emotions. Methods for that are individual, vary per each person.
We understood that in a therapist's work we'll have to find a way to open a person, to help him or her express oneself, that there are 'keys to people', everyone has these.
3. Feelings Cards.
In a corridor there were put large placards with feeling names, with feeling pictures drawn symbolically & simply as well.
We walked around a corridor, we heard music song parts and stood by a proper placard that represented feelings we experienced during that song.
There were 10 songs in total.
We could see & understand how differently different people can react to the same stimuli that way.
4. Circle of Emotions.
We stood in a circle, each of participants spoke one feeling's name & expressed it with a gesture. Everyone repeated that gesture.
We understood that ways to express vary from a person to a person, that 'symbol is never explained forever'.
5. Emotions - Allies or Enemies.
We worked in groups, each group thought, talked and wrote about emotions, whether these are allies or enemies.
Then two representatives of each of our groups shared explainations to everyone.
We understood that during mental ilness emotions are sometimes inadequately shown. Certain people have difficulties of expressing feelings, this results in hindared reactions & social problems.
6. Gifts.
We randomly chose another person in a group, then gave him or her a small gift & commented that in a positive way, before whole group.
Something material or nonmaterial: a postacrd, a mascot, a good word/advice/wish, a banana, a cigarette, etc.
Everyone got a gift.
Sunday, 9 July 2017
'Ex-In' Module 01a/10 - 'Health & Good Mood'; Getting to know each other.
Introduction.
i've enlisted on a course to be a psychotherapist.
It's a way for mentally ill people to help themselves & other mentally ill people using our own experience, as well as some psychological theory, arts & therapeutic group methods.
Details: in this article.
Course consists of 10 modules, each lasting for 3 days, 8 hours each.
Module 01a - 'Health & Good Mood; Getting to know each other'.
During first module we didn't have much of theory. It was mostly exercises related with module's topic, along with explaination & talking about personal experiences after it. This way we could observe how different people experience these, to learn our common points & differencies, to understand others and ourselves, to unite as a group, to see how 'knowledge about us' unfolds.
i am liking this approach, as theory can be read from books - and group exercises are best learned & practiced with other people.
i didn't write in my notes about all of exercises, just of most memorable ones & those that happened in latter stage of the module.
Here's what we did, in short:
1. Interviews & Presentations of the group members.
We paired ourselves with people we know least and talked about ourselves. Then we did present what we did find to others - that's how we were acquainted a little with everyone.
2. Names & Movement.
We went outside, formed a circle & did this exercise. Each of us - including our instructors - spoke a name & added a movement to it, a movement that symbolized & expressed that person. After name & movement was performed, rest of our group followed - spoke name & repeated movement. Then next person did the same and we repeated all names & movements done so far - until all names and moves were executed. Then we did this in reverse direction.
We were told it's a form of 'movement & dance', this was a 'mind-speech-body' mnemonic meant to help us remember our names.
Instructor who introduced us into this exercise is expert at 'movement & dance therapy' - thus our group had this resource, as each of us - both instructors and trainees - added what he or she had best to our group's potential.
3. Symbol of health & of growing healthy.
Each of us drew on a piece of paper our personal symbol of health and growing healthy. Then we paired ourselves with a person we know least (different person than in previous exercise) and talked about meanings. Then we related what we did find out to other members of our group.
This way we started to understand each of us' personal metrics of health, our expectations & process of reaching this state.
4. Pantomime.
We were split into a few of subgroups & given names of movies & native american-styled names to convey by acting without using words or sounds.
Aside from great fun & cooperation, we did learn about nonverbal communication. This example showed us that while stereotypes, known symbols & movie titles are easy to convey, discover & guess, nonverbal communication with unknown people is hard to understand. Once a person is known, it's easier to understand gestures, facial expressions, body language.
We were told that nonverbal communication is one of the topics that we will pay attention to later, as well as an important part of communication & working in a group.
5. Letter to myself.
We wrote a letter to ourselves of how we can care for ourselves, then those who were not too shy - read that message for others' benefits.
We learned that we should take care of ourselves first, then we can help others better.
6. Bringing in something.
We were encouraged to bring something on a course, so others could see & talk. We were told that in next modules we'll talk about these important symbolic items, exact purpose of this exercise should be revealed later.
7. Our strong points.
We were talking with others our strong points, resources we can add for the benefit of our group.
We learned that in a group our personality traits are shared, we can complement each other in a well organized group.
A process of group integration turns individuals into a synergic whole.
That's why Ex-Ins (Experts by Experience) are paired with 'Experts by Education', that's why there usually is more than one of such pairs in a therapeutic, scientific or educational group.
8. Movement Therapy.
With symbolic body movements, breath and voice we were expressing that we absorb good, positive energies and feelings, then using different body movements, breath and voice we were getting rid of negative, harmful, bad things.
Exact copying of moves were not so important - we focused on doing what's a comfortable similarity for us instead. Not everyone participating in therapy has fully healthy body, some have troubles with some exercises, and personal comfort and ease is important for everyone.
9. Acting out Fairy Tales, with a Twist.
We were split into groups and given tasks to act out a childhood tale with narration, but with an alternative ending, with a humorous twist.
Aside from relaxation & cooperation this exercise had a purpose of enhancing our creativity & imagination, it was also a practice of 'getting out of a stereotype', of practicing perceiving thigs from a different perspective. This has uses in a therapy when we will try to understand other patients.
We were asked if we took care of ourselves during this exercise, if our roles were comfortable. (my role was fine with me).
We learned that as soon as we 'put on different glass', our tools & thinking might be no longer useful, no longer convenient. Different people use different means for handling life's situations.
10. How we can take care of others?
We were split into groups and each of groups wrote ideas of how we can help each other.
Our ideas were similar but slightly different, we talked about this for a while.
11. Handling conflicts & difficult situations.
We learned some methods of handling conflicts within our fairly large group, we learned to respect our different responsibilities & roles in a group. Both staff (educators or therapists) as well as customers (trainees and patients) have different responsibilities and roles. For a group exercise to succeed & bring benefit, there has to be respect & a few of formal rules. We learned anarchy does not help, even if psychology allows for some of non-strictness. Our speeches should be essential, related with the subject, to the point - without too much of digression, deviation from subject. Obeying these rules is also respecting the time of ourselves and of others.
Rules and group contracts should be formed & kept to ensure smooth progression of group's goals, but also to ensure that members feel safe in a group.
We learned that group conflicts are best handled early, so 'group's atmosphere won't grow into a giant'.
12. Summary & Parting Ways.
Then we practiced movement, breath & voice exercises to get rid of strong emotions & negativity, summarized our feelings at module's end, talked of how we see possible course's future and parted for now.
Next module will happen in about 3 weeks.
Overall it was great and positive experience - even if emotionally intense; i am looking for course's future with hope & optimism.
i've enlisted on a course to be a psychotherapist.
It's a way for mentally ill people to help themselves & other mentally ill people using our own experience, as well as some psychological theory, arts & therapeutic group methods.
Details: in this article.
Course consists of 10 modules, each lasting for 3 days, 8 hours each.
Module 01a - 'Health & Good Mood; Getting to know each other'.
During first module we didn't have much of theory. It was mostly exercises related with module's topic, along with explaination & talking about personal experiences after it. This way we could observe how different people experience these, to learn our common points & differencies, to understand others and ourselves, to unite as a group, to see how 'knowledge about us' unfolds.
i am liking this approach, as theory can be read from books - and group exercises are best learned & practiced with other people.
i didn't write in my notes about all of exercises, just of most memorable ones & those that happened in latter stage of the module.
Here's what we did, in short:
1. Interviews & Presentations of the group members.
We paired ourselves with people we know least and talked about ourselves. Then we did present what we did find to others - that's how we were acquainted a little with everyone.
2. Names & Movement.
We went outside, formed a circle & did this exercise. Each of us - including our instructors - spoke a name & added a movement to it, a movement that symbolized & expressed that person. After name & movement was performed, rest of our group followed - spoke name & repeated movement. Then next person did the same and we repeated all names & movements done so far - until all names and moves were executed. Then we did this in reverse direction.
We were told it's a form of 'movement & dance', this was a 'mind-speech-body' mnemonic meant to help us remember our names.
Instructor who introduced us into this exercise is expert at 'movement & dance therapy' - thus our group had this resource, as each of us - both instructors and trainees - added what he or she had best to our group's potential.
3. Symbol of health & of growing healthy.
Each of us drew on a piece of paper our personal symbol of health and growing healthy. Then we paired ourselves with a person we know least (different person than in previous exercise) and talked about meanings. Then we related what we did find out to other members of our group.
This way we started to understand each of us' personal metrics of health, our expectations & process of reaching this state.
4. Pantomime.
We were split into a few of subgroups & given names of movies & native american-styled names to convey by acting without using words or sounds.
Aside from great fun & cooperation, we did learn about nonverbal communication. This example showed us that while stereotypes, known symbols & movie titles are easy to convey, discover & guess, nonverbal communication with unknown people is hard to understand. Once a person is known, it's easier to understand gestures, facial expressions, body language.
We were told that nonverbal communication is one of the topics that we will pay attention to later, as well as an important part of communication & working in a group.
5. Letter to myself.
We wrote a letter to ourselves of how we can care for ourselves, then those who were not too shy - read that message for others' benefits.
We learned that we should take care of ourselves first, then we can help others better.
6. Bringing in something.
We were encouraged to bring something on a course, so others could see & talk. We were told that in next modules we'll talk about these important symbolic items, exact purpose of this exercise should be revealed later.
7. Our strong points.
We were talking with others our strong points, resources we can add for the benefit of our group.
We learned that in a group our personality traits are shared, we can complement each other in a well organized group.
A process of group integration turns individuals into a synergic whole.
That's why Ex-Ins (Experts by Experience) are paired with 'Experts by Education', that's why there usually is more than one of such pairs in a therapeutic, scientific or educational group.
8. Movement Therapy.
With symbolic body movements, breath and voice we were expressing that we absorb good, positive energies and feelings, then using different body movements, breath and voice we were getting rid of negative, harmful, bad things.
Exact copying of moves were not so important - we focused on doing what's a comfortable similarity for us instead. Not everyone participating in therapy has fully healthy body, some have troubles with some exercises, and personal comfort and ease is important for everyone.
9. Acting out Fairy Tales, with a Twist.
We were split into groups and given tasks to act out a childhood tale with narration, but with an alternative ending, with a humorous twist.
Aside from relaxation & cooperation this exercise had a purpose of enhancing our creativity & imagination, it was also a practice of 'getting out of a stereotype', of practicing perceiving thigs from a different perspective. This has uses in a therapy when we will try to understand other patients.
We were asked if we took care of ourselves during this exercise, if our roles were comfortable. (my role was fine with me).
We learned that as soon as we 'put on different glass', our tools & thinking might be no longer useful, no longer convenient. Different people use different means for handling life's situations.
10. How we can take care of others?
We were split into groups and each of groups wrote ideas of how we can help each other.
Our ideas were similar but slightly different, we talked about this for a while.
11. Handling conflicts & difficult situations.
We learned some methods of handling conflicts within our fairly large group, we learned to respect our different responsibilities & roles in a group. Both staff (educators or therapists) as well as customers (trainees and patients) have different responsibilities and roles. For a group exercise to succeed & bring benefit, there has to be respect & a few of formal rules. We learned anarchy does not help, even if psychology allows for some of non-strictness. Our speeches should be essential, related with the subject, to the point - without too much of digression, deviation from subject. Obeying these rules is also respecting the time of ourselves and of others.
Rules and group contracts should be formed & kept to ensure smooth progression of group's goals, but also to ensure that members feel safe in a group.
We learned that group conflicts are best handled early, so 'group's atmosphere won't grow into a giant'.
12. Summary & Parting Ways.
Then we practiced movement, breath & voice exercises to get rid of strong emotions & negativity, summarized our feelings at module's end, talked of how we see possible course's future and parted for now.
Next module will happen in about 3 weeks.
Overall it was great and positive experience - even if emotionally intense; i am looking for course's future with hope & optimism.
Friday, 7 July 2017
Turning Weakness into a Strength, into a Way to Benefit Others.
Is mental illness an end of life, a death of a career?
i know it doesn't have to be.
Career is not everything, ill people can be beneficial even when they are unemployed ... but i think working helps - both the ill person itself, as well as others - if work is not immoral.
Laziness & severing social contacts makes symptoms worsen, lack of money takes away independence & access to many tools for benefitting others. Working professionally can be therapeutic as well - it's contact with others, a motivation for caring for oneself & a source of money among other things - but too much of stress & overworking has opposite effect. Working people have better self-esteem, and can use money to help others as well.
i know i'll share my income with noble causes once i am employed.
i've enlisted on a 'Ex-In' (Experience Involved) course, to be a psychotherapist in future.
It's an international european union's project targeted for mentally ill people.
It was tested & proven success in many nations including Germany - therapies that combined Ex-Ins paired with healthy therapists had more of therapeutical successes than therapies with psychotherapists without illness experiences only.
Project Ex-In tries to involve people after psychological crisis into a psychological support network - we will use our knowledge of mental illness that we have (we know a lot of it, we experience it every day), we will use training exerices (not only theoretical knowledge, but also practical techniques of a therapy) that will fill educational gaps & give us tools.
We will help other mentally ill people, sharing our best experiences, sharing best we have learned in life as well as on a course - both from qualified instructors, but also we'll use best tricks of other students; we will use reason & proven methods of dealing with symptoms, mental illness & associated problems. We will look for employment after the course & after internships are over.
First 8 of 240 planned hours passed today, i will share soon what i can about it. It was a great time, with a lot of positive people, with a lot of positive energy. Privacy & confidentiality are important - we agreed to not reveal group dynamics, names, photos & personal experiences of people involved, but we can share ideas about course, it's methods & goals.
Course is free - it's financed by European Union & 'Leonardo' Foundation, will last until December - it is composed of 10 modules, each lasting for 3 days, 8 hours each day.
Paid internships will happen later, lasting for 6 months in total.
Then we'll be able to look for work, with support of the project's organizers.
i've enlisted for this course to help other people, to improve my karma (i am a Buddhist), as well as to find employment & earn money.
it's also a destigmatisation project, i think this is fairly important as well.
'Every being, no matter healthy or ill - is equally important & valuable' - following & paraphrasing words of one of my therapists.
We do not wish to be better or worse than healthy people, we want equal chances & equal treatment for everyone.
Course consists of 10 modules - each lasting for 3 days, 8 hours each day:
1. Health & Good Mood; Getting to know each other.
Discovering & understanding what is health, discovering what is healthy lifestyle, formulating personal strategies that serve improving psychological health and improving relations with family & social network.
2. Empowerment.
Getting familiar and increasing feeling of inner strength, finding ourselves in everyday life situations, gaining & practicing decision making skills, and negotiating & keeping 'contracts' with other people.
3. Experience & Participation.
Supporting process of being aware of thoughts and behaviors associated with experiences during psychic illness periods, gaining skill of 'reflection' and acquiring 'insight' by talking about ourselves in a group, and by listening to other people.
4. Getting Healthier.
Increasing awareness and reflection on one's own history of getting ill and getting healthier, acquiring knowledge of processess that support getting healthier and about people who regained health; making decision & active entrance into a process of planning one's own getting-healthy-plan.
5. Trialog.
Understanding value of trialog, of cooperation with: a. person with mental ilness experience, b. her or his family and social network, c. professionals (doctor, therapist); this cooperation gives opportunity to discover differing perspectives and views on the same occurances, and in consequence acquiring possibility of getting more effective support on a way to being healthy.
6. Self-Discovery.
Therapists usually don't talk with their clients about their psychotic symptoms, because there's possibility of invoking psychotic symptoms' conents returns. In a consequence, we attempt to treat ill person in a way that does not touch directly neither these painful experiences, nor consequences of illness. Most of people who experiences psychological crisis has a feeling that traditional psychiatry does not perceive and does not understand their experiences, and in fact adds to their distance from society more than it did help. Experiencing symptoms has it's meaning however. Traditional psychiatric operations are focused on limits resulting from illness, instead of supporting patient's need to influence his or her own getting-healthier-process. By the end of this module, participants will be able to share and write about their own mental illness experiences, in a consistent, understandable and structured way; they will get acquainted with various approaches and models that explain psychic disturbances; they will understand basic rules of performing interview that explores one's own experience; will be able to understand better their own experiences associated with mental illness (especially so called psychotic experiences, especially about so called 'hearing voices').
7. Advocacy for mentally ill people.
Equipping people with mental illness experience with neccessary knowlege, skills and competences, required for fulfilling role of advocacy for mentally ill people (for example, by creating associations, leading educational activities, and other), in a way that will allow them to have a real influence on introducing and shaping changes in a healthcare system, in a way that beneficiary's voice is heard when decisions fall - so therapeutic activities are best suited for patients' needs.
8. Rating the Getting-Healthier Process.
Module allows participants of the course to develop knowledge and skills needed for accompanying other people that are experiencing a crisis, to familiarize & understand their situation, to be able to support them with making plans for future and rate getting-healthier process (of their own and of others). Module has also a goal of helping people with mental illness experience to order & structure their thoughts, feelings and to give meaning to experiences resulting from mental illness. It's to teach about introducing best planning strategies for building relations with other people, that will be useful in continuing self-development process.
9. Companionship & Support.
In the Western World, since a long time people with mental illness experience (in remission) are professionally active both in psychological health institutions, advisory, and in influencing quality of psychiatric services. This activity is based on a thought that a person who experienced mental illness understands needs and expectations of his or her own, and of other people touched by the same illness. Supporting person, who is based on his or her own experiences can serve as a positive example model. These people are independent and fulfill role of an expert, who in a way intermediates between professionals (doctors, therapists) and ill people. A person in remission explains and shares knowledge of methods and behaviors that were useful in a getting-healthier process. By the module's end, participants will know rules of supporting mentally ill people, will acquire varied knowledge and meaning of using it in a process of supporting by communication and work put into building relations; Will be able to reflect upon their own style of supporting others.
10. Intervention during a crisis.
Goal of this module is participants acquiring skill of safe performance in a crisis situation, develop empathy, understanding of a crisis and going through difficult life situations. Additional goal is learning of how to support other people who experience different types of crises.
For more about project (in a polish language), feel free to visit: a page.
i know it doesn't have to be.
Career is not everything, ill people can be beneficial even when they are unemployed ... but i think working helps - both the ill person itself, as well as others - if work is not immoral.
Laziness & severing social contacts makes symptoms worsen, lack of money takes away independence & access to many tools for benefitting others. Working professionally can be therapeutic as well - it's contact with others, a motivation for caring for oneself & a source of money among other things - but too much of stress & overworking has opposite effect. Working people have better self-esteem, and can use money to help others as well.
i know i'll share my income with noble causes once i am employed.
i've enlisted on a 'Ex-In' (Experience Involved) course, to be a psychotherapist in future.
It's an international european union's project targeted for mentally ill people.
It was tested & proven success in many nations including Germany - therapies that combined Ex-Ins paired with healthy therapists had more of therapeutical successes than therapies with psychotherapists without illness experiences only.
Project Ex-In tries to involve people after psychological crisis into a psychological support network - we will use our knowledge of mental illness that we have (we know a lot of it, we experience it every day), we will use training exerices (not only theoretical knowledge, but also practical techniques of a therapy) that will fill educational gaps & give us tools.
We will help other mentally ill people, sharing our best experiences, sharing best we have learned in life as well as on a course - both from qualified instructors, but also we'll use best tricks of other students; we will use reason & proven methods of dealing with symptoms, mental illness & associated problems. We will look for employment after the course & after internships are over.
First 8 of 240 planned hours passed today, i will share soon what i can about it. It was a great time, with a lot of positive people, with a lot of positive energy. Privacy & confidentiality are important - we agreed to not reveal group dynamics, names, photos & personal experiences of people involved, but we can share ideas about course, it's methods & goals.
Course is free - it's financed by European Union & 'Leonardo' Foundation, will last until December - it is composed of 10 modules, each lasting for 3 days, 8 hours each day.
Paid internships will happen later, lasting for 6 months in total.
Then we'll be able to look for work, with support of the project's organizers.
i've enlisted for this course to help other people, to improve my karma (i am a Buddhist), as well as to find employment & earn money.
it's also a destigmatisation project, i think this is fairly important as well.
'Every being, no matter healthy or ill - is equally important & valuable' - following & paraphrasing words of one of my therapists.
We do not wish to be better or worse than healthy people, we want equal chances & equal treatment for everyone.
Course consists of 10 modules - each lasting for 3 days, 8 hours each day:
1. Health & Good Mood; Getting to know each other.
Discovering & understanding what is health, discovering what is healthy lifestyle, formulating personal strategies that serve improving psychological health and improving relations with family & social network.
2. Empowerment.
Getting familiar and increasing feeling of inner strength, finding ourselves in everyday life situations, gaining & practicing decision making skills, and negotiating & keeping 'contracts' with other people.
3. Experience & Participation.
Supporting process of being aware of thoughts and behaviors associated with experiences during psychic illness periods, gaining skill of 'reflection' and acquiring 'insight' by talking about ourselves in a group, and by listening to other people.
4. Getting Healthier.
Increasing awareness and reflection on one's own history of getting ill and getting healthier, acquiring knowledge of processess that support getting healthier and about people who regained health; making decision & active entrance into a process of planning one's own getting-healthy-plan.
5. Trialog.
Understanding value of trialog, of cooperation with: a. person with mental ilness experience, b. her or his family and social network, c. professionals (doctor, therapist); this cooperation gives opportunity to discover differing perspectives and views on the same occurances, and in consequence acquiring possibility of getting more effective support on a way to being healthy.
6. Self-Discovery.
Therapists usually don't talk with their clients about their psychotic symptoms, because there's possibility of invoking psychotic symptoms' conents returns. In a consequence, we attempt to treat ill person in a way that does not touch directly neither these painful experiences, nor consequences of illness. Most of people who experiences psychological crisis has a feeling that traditional psychiatry does not perceive and does not understand their experiences, and in fact adds to their distance from society more than it did help. Experiencing symptoms has it's meaning however. Traditional psychiatric operations are focused on limits resulting from illness, instead of supporting patient's need to influence his or her own getting-healthier-process. By the end of this module, participants will be able to share and write about their own mental illness experiences, in a consistent, understandable and structured way; they will get acquainted with various approaches and models that explain psychic disturbances; they will understand basic rules of performing interview that explores one's own experience; will be able to understand better their own experiences associated with mental illness (especially so called psychotic experiences, especially about so called 'hearing voices').
7. Advocacy for mentally ill people.
Equipping people with mental illness experience with neccessary knowlege, skills and competences, required for fulfilling role of advocacy for mentally ill people (for example, by creating associations, leading educational activities, and other), in a way that will allow them to have a real influence on introducing and shaping changes in a healthcare system, in a way that beneficiary's voice is heard when decisions fall - so therapeutic activities are best suited for patients' needs.
8. Rating the Getting-Healthier Process.
Module allows participants of the course to develop knowledge and skills needed for accompanying other people that are experiencing a crisis, to familiarize & understand their situation, to be able to support them with making plans for future and rate getting-healthier process (of their own and of others). Module has also a goal of helping people with mental illness experience to order & structure their thoughts, feelings and to give meaning to experiences resulting from mental illness. It's to teach about introducing best planning strategies for building relations with other people, that will be useful in continuing self-development process.
9. Companionship & Support.
In the Western World, since a long time people with mental illness experience (in remission) are professionally active both in psychological health institutions, advisory, and in influencing quality of psychiatric services. This activity is based on a thought that a person who experienced mental illness understands needs and expectations of his or her own, and of other people touched by the same illness. Supporting person, who is based on his or her own experiences can serve as a positive example model. These people are independent and fulfill role of an expert, who in a way intermediates between professionals (doctors, therapists) and ill people. A person in remission explains and shares knowledge of methods and behaviors that were useful in a getting-healthier process. By the module's end, participants will know rules of supporting mentally ill people, will acquire varied knowledge and meaning of using it in a process of supporting by communication and work put into building relations; Will be able to reflect upon their own style of supporting others.
10. Intervention during a crisis.
Goal of this module is participants acquiring skill of safe performance in a crisis situation, develop empathy, understanding of a crisis and going through difficult life situations. Additional goal is learning of how to support other people who experience different types of crises.
For more about project (in a polish language), feel free to visit: a page.
Saturday, 22 April 2017
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)